MEMOIRS by Anonymous

I was dripping wet, apparently from the rain falling unending, I hurriedly entered the hall where other participants were seated for the job interview. There he was, my partner of 3 years twice removed- now a stranger. He handed over a paper to me “Mimidoo, here are the questions you should expect when its your turn” I closed my eyes to prevent the tears from flowing, my makeup was already half ruined by the rain. Segun, has always been my knight in shining armour, coming to my rescue whenever I didn’t need it.

Tom, tom tom.. my wide open mouth received droplets of water from the leaking roof, I jolted up from the make shift bed. Oh! So it was all a dream. For the fourth time in one week, images of Segun haunted my dreams, and his thoughts made my waking moments miserable. We met as students, became friends before taking our friendship a little lower than the highest level. Segun was the fantasy of all the female students, but I was privileged to have him to myself, the lady of his manor. As an undergraduate, I was quite a sight to behold, whenever I made an entrance, everyone else faded into oblivion. Was it the beauty? Maybe it was the charisma, I couldn’t tell which but I was aware that the aura that oozed had both males and females wishing and a handful of ladies hating. I and Segun couldn’t have been better matched. Thanks to Blaze who invited me to his departmental freshers’ night.

Sage was the name I made for him. A meaningful derivative of the bivalved form of Segun. He was way beyond my reach now. We broke up in a friendly bitter manner and it was entirely my fault. The cravings couldn’t seem to stop, I wanted more and more. The attention I was getting  from eligible males latched onto my eyes like blinders, I became unable to separate the wheat from the chaff. It continued that way until I couldn’t bear it any more, I stormed out from Sage’s house over a minor resolvable issue and never looked back, and he didn’t bother to draw me back, not that I cared at that moment.

Years later I met  Tunde , Tunde was a native of one of the major tribes in the country, the same as Segun, I was from a lesser tribe, migrants from the present day Congo.  Tunde was a man to be yoked with anytime of the day if you loved them unserious, for some reason , the “good girl- bad boy” phenomenon possessed me and I found myself in his deceitful arms. After series of abortions and 2 years in a drug rehabilitation facility, I needed to break free from my self -imposed bondage, I had to heal from the damages inflicted on me by that disastrous relationship. I was ready to go clean and start afresh, I lost contact with most of my friends and I wasn’t even sure of who will be true to me as a friend. Trust had become priceless. My mind went back to Segun

Segun- the man of my dreams, Segun- my unattainable fantansies,  he was beyond my reach now. Sage had become my Forbidden obsession. Far away, yet so near.

Life’s lessons- PLAN NOT TO FAIL

Yesterday being mothers’ day, I made a huge pot of fried rice using a recipe I had perfected over the years from experience, I looked back and realized how far I had come and most importantly the falls, bruises, ascents and scars that have been significant in my process of accretion.

I recalled one experience that has never left my memory. I was about 6 years younger than I am now and the youth in my parish were organizing a cooking competition, I was selected to represent my group alongside another member of our all- winning group. All necessary preparations were done, armed with money in our pockets, we went to the market and bought the necessities for the big day. I come from a family where purchases especially kitchen supplies are often made in large quantities because of large number of mouths to feed and also because of my economic principle of buying more to save more which not everyone will understand. I bought accordingly.

On the big day, we presented our ingredients and set off cooking, we cooked deliciously of course but we ended up with the second position. The judges did not only buttress our strengths and successes, they also told us where we went wrong. Ours was in buying and presenting more than we needed for the competition at hand, ours was in not applying simple planning strategies, we failed to plan accordingly for the project, we had excesses, it was outright waste.

Knowledge isn’t always enough for success, having the wisdom to apply knowledge appropriately is an indispensable key. In every project and every activity, proper planning, budgeting and allocation of available resources not only ensure success, they leave us with a feeling of satisfaction. Why do it anyhow when you can do it the right way.

I take every failure and loss I encounter very seriously, not because I lack the spirit of sportsmanship but because I usually have a hard time getting over the feeling of inadequacy and unpreparedness. I always beat up myself for not having done better when I clearly could have. It comes with great prices of sleepless nights but at the end of it all, the experience equips me with lessons and a decision to do better next time. When such opportunities present themselves again, knowing where I had failed earlier, I come out better because experience taught me so.